Saturday, 29 September 2012

He was a Sk8er Boi, she said see you later boy...

Now Skater Boy and I got chatting to on Hot or Not. I have been a member of this site since I was 17, as me and Miss Koko thought it would be an interesting social experiment to see if a slutty profile (mine) or an innocent profile (hers) would get the most hits and attention. Even back in school we were too curious for our own good! Anyway that is another story...

So since deciding to see what online dating is like, I re-en stated my account to check out what the people were like on there. I updated the photos and the about me and waited to see if anyone was interested. Within the first 24 hours me and Skater Boy got chatting. I think we were chatting non-stop until 5am, although I didn't notice the time until an email came through on my phone and I noticed the time on that. It was crazy. Although I think the two cups of coffee I had drunk after 3pm, was one of the reasons I was so wide awake. I had never felt such an ease or an instant connection with a guy like I had with him. I was actually excited the next night to chat to him. So the next night came and went and so did the non-stop chatter. So I bit the bullet and messaged him my number. It was a spur of the moment thing, but it just felt right. Then came the waiting for him to text and my god did he make me wait. It wasn't until the evening of the next day that I got a message from him. I thought he wasn't interested in me, so had put him to the back of my mind, but I was super excited when I received his text. Now like stated in the song, we couldn't be more different. He is still a full on skater boy in looks and lifestyle. And I am more quirky and girly with my fashion sense. He is into cars, skating and hanging out at his friends houses until the early morning and I like shopping, reading and going for coffee with friends. However, despite our differences there was something about him. Well, they do say opposites attract after all. So after a few weeks of texting back and for and getting to know each other more, we arranged our first date.

So, for our first date we arranged to meet in my hometown and go for a walk and a chat. I was quite nervous in the morning as we weren't meeting until the afternoon, so I took the opportunity to make the most of the morning to get ready and make myself look pretty, well not Barbie pretty, but scruffy me pretty. We arranged to meet on the sea front, as it was a pretty easy location for him to find. I left the house early and I was going to call in on Miss Koko in work, for some a last minute pep talk, but I ended up bumping into Skater Boy instead. He had gotten off the bus at the wrong stop and was aimlessly walking around hoping to bump into me. I also got a bbm from Miss Koko saying she had seen him walk past the shop and he didn't seem bad looking from what she saw. God bless technology and your best friend rating the guy before you have even met him. So we went on this epic walk to the beach and all around the town. We talked about anything and everything and it was easy being in his company. So after he left, I went round Miss Koko's for a girly post-date gossip. I was quite excited for our second date :)

So a week later our second date was confirmed. We decided on a cinema date after I finished work. We had been texting all day and he had very gallantly told me he was paying for our entire date. Now I am not the type of girl to have a guy pay for the entire date. I always believe in 50/50 or I'll pay for it all. I can be a stubborn feminist when I want to be o:) But I do like it when a guy offers. If nothing else it shows he is not tight with his money. However, in the end, I gave my feminist half a night off and I let him pay for the cinema tickets. Apparently, male pride gets very dented if you don't let a man pay. My only condition to him paying, was that he also had to pick the film. This was a way of stopping us standing there for ages trying to decide. He opted for 'Total Recall'. BAD CHOICE! The film was awful! It should have been renamed "Total Crap". So we chose our seats and settled down to wait for the film to start. I know I shouldn't, but whenever I am in the cinema I can't help but put my feet up on the seats if no one is sitting in front of me. So I was sitting there, feet up and waiting for the film to start, when Skater Boy turns to me and points out that I have very small feet. Now, I might not be the tallest of girls, but I have size 6 feet, so I like to think that that is a standard girl shoe size. It is certainly the shoe size that sells out fastest in shops. However, I was starting to see a pattern developing, as on our first date we were walking and he suddenly comes out with, "you're quite short aren't you". I am 5ft 4!!!! Not that tall, but not that short either. His charm technique really needs to be worked on :P So back to the terrible film. It was dull and boring and at one point I was tempted to sneak in a cheeky nap, but he caught me. Although he thought I was crying, not attempting to have a snooze. I admitted the film was terrible and he did say we could leave. But I was determined to see this film out. Plus I was curious to see if he would make a move. I'm afraid to say he didn't. Not even the old stretch and yawn technique. I was quite disappointed. When the film finished I had to head for the train home, so we walked to the station together. My train didn't come in for another 15 minutes so we sat on the station platform chatting some more. When it was time to say goodbye, we hugged and departed. Still no attempt to make a move on me. Now I know it can work both ways, but I am an old fashioned girl in that respect and think the guy should make the first move. Even if it was just hand holding walking back to the station, it would have been something. Now Skater Boy is quite shy, so I wasn't expecting to be swept off my feet, like the women in old black and white films, but I did kind of expect a quick peck on the lips. I think it was at that point I realised the initial spark was starting to fizzle out.

We continued to text for a few more weeks, but the spark seemed to be there less and less. He is an amazing guy and will treat any lady like a Princess, of that I am sure, but we were just not suited in the end. We have said we will stay friends and I hope we do, as he is such a nice guy and can easily make me laugh, but just not my Prince Charming to sweep this Princess off her feet :P

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x

Wednesday, 26 September 2012

The Story so far...

..... So I have been internet dating now for roughly two months and what a roller coaster it is becoming!
From BDSM and threesome invites, to men going off on one even before the date has even been set, it is certainly an eye opener into the world of internet dating.

Now internet dating seems to have quite a bad reputation in people's minds, as being a place to basically arrange sex with strangers.And whilst I have had some sexual offers suggested to me, the majority of men on there seem to genuinely be looking to date and eventually get into a relationship with someone. If you tell someone you are signed up to a dating website, you get a sort of 'poor thing' look from them. It is like you have exhausted attempting to date in the real world and you are now resorting to finding someone to date using the virtual realm. Some crazy cat lady spinster, who is so unlucky in love she has to resort to dating webistes like a sad act. However, more and more people are meeting through internet sites and lasting longer than those who haven't. If you think about it though, how is it that different from meeting someone on a night out? You are both strangers, but after chatting for a while you exchange numbers and then hope they text you the next day. Well with internet dating you get to know someone, exchange numbers and then arrange a date. Only difference is you're going in slightly blind to who they are. Although social networking websites reveal a lot about a person before you meet them. Sometimes can work to the potential dates disadvantage.I never add someone to my personal facebook account until a date is on the cards. It is doing marvels to my twitter account though! My followers are gradually going up. Anything to plug this blog I suppose :P

I was thinking the other day, (very dangerous now I am blonde), that internet dating is like an interview process. The dating profile is like you CV. After initially judging the person on their picture, (which, lets face it, looks are the first thing that will attract you to someone), you scroll down to read about them. After weighing up whether the profile appeals to you, you will either send a message to them, or will have received a message from them. Then after a few messages back and for, sussing them out, (the interview process), you will decide whether to commit to a date or not (securing the job). Maybe it is just me who can see the comparisons. Wouldn't be the first time I've thought something that no one else has agreed with o:) My friend Computer Geek proved my theory about the importance of a good profile though. I made a bet with him that, if he could get 5 girls to contact him, he would have to buy me a My Little Pony. A few weeks after we made the bet, he had only 2 people message him. I couldn't understand why he was getting such a low response rate. Then I saw his profile! His pictures were allof him with a pint in his hand, making him look like an alcoholic and his description was him waffling on about unimportant things.So after a few tweaks to his profile and making his description less boring, he is now getting a lot more messages and even a few phone numbers. RESULT! And I got a pink My Little Pony toy with rainbow hair :D I called her Princess Sparkle.

Whilst I have spoken to a lot of guys on there, only two have progressed to the phone number stage with me: Skater Boy and Blue Eyed Boy. I went on two dates with Skater Boy and whilst he is one of the good guys out there, it just didn't work out, (there is a blog about this to follow).  Blue Eyed Boy on the other hand has me intrigued. He is funny, feisty and good looking and we are going to go on our first date hopefully this Sunday. Also, Miss Koko has stalked his facebook page and cannot find anything bad about him either. It is weird, that even though we haven't met, there seems to be a spark between us that I haven't felt with anyone, since the BFG. He just seems to get me. It could all be an act of course, but my highly built defences seem to have dropped loads where he is concerned and, as my friends can vouch, this is a pretty big thing to happen to me. I have become fond of the defence I built up and for it to have been lowered so easily, with someone I have yet to meet is scary. Alike with Skater Boy, I have been able to be my complete self when conversing with Blue Eyed Boy. And so far the crazy hasn't scared him off. Lets just hope that we hit it off in reality, or it will be back to the drawing board and a massive glass of wine and a watching of Bridget Jones's Diary to remind me that spinsters can find love too.

So, for anyone thinking about online dating but unsure about it, I think you should go for it! You have nothing to lose and if nothing else you will have great stories of terrible dates and amusing messages from people to share with friends over a glass of wine. You also get to chat to and potentially meet some great guys and have fun going on dates. Or if they do not appeal to you, you just don't reply to their messages. However, always make sure you are safe when going on blind dates. I keep joking with Blue Eyed Boy that I am going to bring mace and a rape alarm on our date. But in reality, it is a pretty smart idea just in case :P

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x

Monday, 10 September 2012

Someone has been taking 50 Shades of Grey too seriously...

Now for anyone who has used Plenty of Fish, the general consensus seems to be that it is just a sex site. Whilst this can be the case for some people, (I have been asked to join in in two threesomes, two dominatrix have asked to "corrupt" me and one guy told me last night that I need to invest in a helmet, as he is going to put me through the headboard), there are some genuinely amazing guys on there too. So don't be put off by the odd guy pushing his luck to see if you will sleep with him. I have spoken to some amazing guys and I feel they need to be defended, as they are on there for genuine romantic reasons, rather than a quick 'how's your father' and you will never hear from them again.

However, when looking at guys profiles on the site, quite a few are buying into the 50 shades character 'Christian Grey', using it as their profile names, occupations and even putting it in their 'about me'. Now I have read the 50 Shades trilogy and I can't say I was overly impressed with them. The sex scenes were ridiculous and by the third book I just skipped them as they started to get boring. It was like I was becoming desensitised to the "kinky" sex scenes and wishing the writer would just get on with the story, rather than padding out the book with yet another sex scene. Speaking to some of my friends who have also read the books, they tended to agree with me. Whilst the character of Christian Grey can seem appealing to a woman, I mean he is described as being incredibly good looking and rich to boot - he is just that, a fictional character in a book. But men seem to be under the impression that these books have inspired women to be sexual deviants. Whilst there may have been an increase in women looking into a bdsm kind of lifestyle after reading the books, I still think these women are in the minority and rather than the majority.

So the first dom to message me was really polite about it. He asked me if I had ever thought of getting into a bdsm relationship and answered my questions about how he got started in that lifestyle. He didn't badger me when I rejected his offer and was just very polite. I'm sure it is a different matter in the bedroom though :P

The second dom was a little more persistant. He said he wanted to corrupt me as I looked like a good girl and it would be amazing to spank me. I decided again to question him and have a bit of fun at the same time. NOT in that way, just by being a little bit cheeky and sarcastic with my responses. Here is an extract of some of our messages:

Me: So how does this sub/ dom thing normally work then? x

Dom: It intrigues you? I would ld be discreet. Don't be shy x

Me: Not really, but in order to get the full picture of the kind of thing you are into it would be rude not to ask x

Dom: Ha true. I'm not some crazy kinky nut job. I'm easy going and laid back. Good fun, but I do have some kinks, I like the idea of corrupting someone like yourself, discreetly of course. Do as I say behind closed doors, although any boundaries and no go areas would be discussed prior to any "play". Google bdsm. X

Me: Do I look like I need corrupting then? x

Dom: Perhaps, you may think you don't but you're probably a little naive. I have experience, would love to open your eyes to the potential excitement the lifestyle brings. It wouldn't be full on btw, I lead a busy life and have other interests, I'm just kinky x

Me: Well if I ever decide to open my eyes to the world of bdsm then I will be sure to let you know x

Dom: I would love to train and corrupt you, turn you into a bad girl. Are you a good girl?

               I'd treat you well, but also punish you. Spanking you would be delicious x

Me: yeah but I bruise really easily so this wouldn't work out well for me x

Ok so the formatting isn't aligning properly, but you get the jist. More messages were exchanged but unfortunately, our conversations have now stopped as I wouldn't give him my number.  It always amused me getting a new message from him though. I never knew what he would come out with next. I don't think I would make a very good sub though, as I hate being told what to do and as far as I can tell that is the whole point of being a submissive. So I won't be playing the Ana Steele to his Christian Grey scenario. But I am sure there are women out there who will do, so I doubt he will be playing alone for long...

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x

Tuesday, 4 September 2012

Curls, Curls, Curls, I just can't say no!

Now this guy was someone I was actually in University with, (but he didn't remember me, but in fairness people from school don't often recognise me, so I can forgive him that), but we ended up reconnecting on Plenty of Fish. If you can't guess by the title I am going to call him 'Curls' and yes it is because he has curly hair, which he is very proud of.

Now Curls seemed like an awesome guy. As I actually knew that his pictures were him, having sat across from him in criminology tutorials, I knew I wasn't talking to a 50 year old computer geek, messaging me from him Mother's basement. So after a week or so of messaging back and for, he proposed meeting up. He seemed fun and flirty, so I was quite excited to see if the banter was there in reality, or if it was a case of confidence due to hiding behind the mask of modern technology. So we decided to go to a student pub in Cardiff and all that was left was deciding a day.

This is where it all started to go wrong. On the Friday, Curls went on a night out with his friends in Bristol and for the next few days there was no contact. I don't really tend to chase guys and text them all the time when getting to know someone, so I left it to him to get in touch. He did the following Tuesday, accusing me of ignoring him. I pointed out it worked both ways and things got back into the flirty banter again. However, he raised meeting up again in the next few days. I replied that I wasn't sure when I was free as my 5 year old Cousin was down from London, so I'd be spending some time with her and that I couldn't state a day there and then. He went MAD! Said I was wasting his time and that he wasn't going to bother with me anymore.... Fair enough and that was the last I thought I would hear from him.

How WRONG was I! Was just popping onto Plenty of Fish one night to reply to some messages and a message from him pops up. I'd been honest with him from the start that I was on the site in order to blog about my experiences on there. So after he enquired as to why I was still on there, a little bit of conversation started to flow. He had originally deleted his account when we started talking and so I asked him how come he had reinstated it. He said it was due to boredom and he hadn't met anyone nice. Then he accused me of being mean when it was going so well between us. I read the last bit wrong and replied about that I'd been on a date with someone and because I wanted him to leave me alone I may have invented two more dates. I know it was wrong of me to do that, but I didn't want to waste his time talking to him anymore. He then accused me of being an attention seeking slut! First time I have ever been called that and I laughed soooo hard, especially when telling my friends about it later on. I may have antagonised him a little after that by telling him I WAS a massive slut and he had had a lucky escape. Wasn't the smartest thing to do, but after being accused of being a slut, my sarcastic side took over! If he hadn't had his little freak out about me not knowing my availability, then maybe we'd be on our second or third date by now, but it just wasn't meant to be.

Curls, if you're reading this I genuinely wish you no hard feelings. I just can't deal with people accusing me of being things that I am not. I hope you do meet a nice girl and someone who appreciates your curly locks.

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x