Someone has been taking 50 Shades of Grey too seriously...

Now for anyone who has used Plenty of Fish, the general consensus seems to be that it is just a sex site. Whilst this can be the case for some people, (I have been asked to join in in two threesomes, two dominatrix have asked to "corrupt" me and one guy told me last night that I need to invest in a helmet, as he is going to put me through the headboard), there are some genuinely amazing guys on there too. So don't be put off by the odd guy pushing his luck to see if you will sleep with him. I have spoken to some amazing guys and I feel they need to be defended, as they are on there for genuine romantic reasons, rather than a quick 'how's your father' and you will never hear from them again.

However, when looking at guys profiles on the site, quite a few are buying into the 50 shades character 'Christian Grey', using it as their profile names, occupations and even putting it in their 'about me'. Now I have read the 50 Shades trilogy and I can't say I was overly impressed with them. The sex scenes were ridiculous and by the third book I just skipped them as they started to get boring. It was like I was becoming desensitised to the "kinky" sex scenes and wishing the writer would just get on with the story, rather than padding out the book with yet another sex scene. Speaking to some of my friends who have also read the books, they tended to agree with me. Whilst the character of Christian Grey can seem appealing to a woman, I mean he is described as being incredibly good looking and rich to boot - he is just that, a fictional character in a book. But men seem to be under the impression that these books have inspired women to be sexual deviants. Whilst there may have been an increase in women looking into a bdsm kind of lifestyle after reading the books, I still think these women are in the minority and rather than the majority.

So the first dom to message me was really polite about it. He asked me if I had ever thought of getting into a bdsm relationship and answered my questions about how he got started in that lifestyle. He didn't badger me when I rejected his offer and was just very polite. I'm sure it is a different matter in the bedroom though :P

The second dom was a little more persistant. He said he wanted to corrupt me as I looked like a good girl and it would be amazing to spank me. I decided again to question him and have a bit of fun at the same time. NOT in that way, just by being a little bit cheeky and sarcastic with my responses. Here is an extract of some of our messages:

Me: So how does this sub/ dom thing normally work then? x

Dom: It intrigues you? I would ld be discreet. Don't be shy x

	Me: Not really, but in order to get the full picture of the kind of thing you are into it would be rude not to ask x
	Dom: Ha true. I'm not some crazy kinky nut job. I'm easy going and laid back. Good fun, but I do have some kinks, I like the idea of corrupting someone like yourself, discreetly of course. Do as I say behind closed doors, although any boundaries and no go areas would be discussed prior to any "play". Google bdsm. X

			Me: Do I look like I need corrupting then? x
		Dom: Perhaps, you may think you don't but you're probably a little naive. I have experience, would love to open your eyes to the potential excitement the lifestyle brings. It wouldn't be full on btw, I lead a busy life and have other interests, I'm just kinky x
	Me: Well if I ever decide to open my eyes to the world of bdsm then I will be sure to let you know x
	Dom: I would love to train and corrupt you, turn you into a bad girl. Are you a good girl?                    ....

	I'd treat you well, but also punish you. Spanking you would be delicious x
		Me: yeah but I bruise really easily so this wouldn't work out well for me x Ok so the formatting isn't aligning properly, but you get the jist. More messages were exchanged but unfortunately, our conversations have now stopped as I wouldn't give him my number.  It always amused me getting a new message from him though. I never knew what he would come out with next. I don't think I would make a very good sub though, as I hate being told what to do and as far as I can tell that is the whole point of being a submissive. So I won't be playing the Ana Steele to his Christian Grey scenario. But I am sure there are women out there who will do, so I doubt he will be playing alone for long... Peace Out Random Quirky Girl x

Curls, Curls, Curls, I just can't say no!

Now this guy was someone I was actually in University with, (but he didn't remember me, but in fairness people from school don't often recognise me, so I can forgive him that), but we ended up reconnecting on Plenty of Fish. If you can't guess by the title I am going to call him 'Curls' and yes it is because he has curly hair, which he is very proud of.

Now Curls seemed like an awesome guy. As I actually knew that his pictures were him, having sat across from him in criminology tutorials, I knew I wasn't talking to a 50 year old computer geek, messaging me from him Mother's basement. So after a week or so of messaging back and for, he proposed meeting up. He seemed fun and flirty, so I was quite excited to see if the banter was there in reality, or if it was a case of confidence due to hiding behind the mask of modern technology. So we decided to go to a student pub in Cardiff and all that was left was deciding a day.

This is where it all started to go wrong. On the Friday, Curls went on a night out with his friends in Bristol and for the next few days there was no contact. I don't really tend to chase guys and text them all the time when getting to know someone, so I left it to him to get in touch. He did the following Tuesday, accusing me of ignoring him. I pointed out it worked both ways and things got back into the flirty banter again. However, he raised meeting up again in the next few days. I replied that I wasn't sure when I was free as my 5 year old Cousin was down from London, so I'd be spending some time with her and that I couldn't state a day there and then. He went MAD! Said I was wasting his time and that he wasn't going to bother with me anymore.... Fair enough and that was the last I thought I would hear from him.

How WRONG was I! Was just popping onto Plenty of Fish one night to reply to some messages and a message from him pops up. I'd been honest with him from the start that I was on the site in order to blog about my experiences on there. So after he enquired as to why I was still on there, a little bit of conversation started to flow. He had originally deleted his account when we started talking and so I asked him how come he had reinstated it. He said it was due to boredom and he hadn't met anyone nice. Then he accused me of being mean when it was going so well between us. I read the last bit wrong and replied about that I'd been on a date with someone and because I wanted him to leave me alone I may have invented two more dates. I know it was wrong of me to do that, but I didn't want to waste his time talking to him anymore. He then accused me of being an attention seeking slut! First time I have ever been called that and I laughed soooo hard, especially when telling my friends about it later on. I may have antagonised him a little after that by telling him I WAS a massive slut and he had had a lucky escape. Wasn't the smartest thing to do, but after being accused of being a slut, my sarcastic side took over! If he hadn't had his little freak out about me not knowing my availability, then maybe we'd be on our second or third date by now, but it just wasn't meant to be.

Curls, if you're reading this I genuinely wish you no hard feelings. I just can't deal with people accusing me of being things that I am not. I hope you do meet a nice girl and someone who appreciates your curly locks.

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x

All the Single Ladies...

So I have been a very lazy blogger recently and I would like to apologise for that. Whilst my written word has been silent, I have been busily researching a direction in which to take my blog...

It is actually due to my trip to Norway with Miss Red Star, Miss Burlesque and Miss Wayne's World, that I got the inspiration in which I shall be blogging about from now on. I will still add random ones as and when I think about them, but for the time being this new plan will be the main focus of my blog. I can hear you thinking, "what the fuck is she rabbiting on about, just get on with it already", but all, my dear reader, is about to be revealed :)

So myself and the girls were chilling out round the dinner table in Norway after another successful food -poison free meal, (I am known to food poison people easily with my cooking skills), with glasses full of wine and discussing some horrendous dating experiences. In fairness, we all seemed to have it easy compared to Miss Burlesque. She had some crackers. For example, on a date with an accountant, (who kept dropping in to conversation that he made £80,000 after tax, yet still lived at home with his parents), he ended up asking to split the bill with her. She had had wine (something which I think was necessary to get through the night with him) and he did not, so he felt it was only fair to pay for what they had actually had. The bill was £25 in total for the two of them!!!!! Major cheapskate if you ask me. I am all for equality etc. but when you have spent the night bragging about your earnings, rather ungentlemanly, then I think it is only fair that you pay. Another example of one of her dating disasters was when she was texting this guy to meet up and he text her one day to say that he was signed off work for a week and intended to spend his time furiously masturbating in his room. He then wondered why she wasn't interested anymore.... So the question had to be asked how she was meeting all these weirdos. She replied - online dating. It was a light bulb moment (ironically my nickname on that trip, light bulb not moment) and I thought that this was something I could get involved with and blog about. Now I haven't really done Miss Burlesque's horror dates justice, as at the time we were all weak with laughter, but If I tried to recreate the story telling, it would be too long for the blog. But as a single lady, I thought it could be fun blogging about my experiences in the realm of online dating.

When I got home, I signed up to Plenty of Fish (as this was the site Miss Burlesque used) and updated a very, very old Hot or Not profile. And my god has it been an eye opening experience. I have so far been offered 2 threesomes, 2 bdsm invitations, (apparently I look like the type of girl to be corrupted according to this one guy. I just think he has believed the 50 shades hype too much), a lesbian tried to get me to bat for a more female only team and just general sleazeballs. However, I must also note that I have spoken to some genuinely nice men on there too. Although, if another man opens with the line, "Hi, I just wanted to let you know how beautiful you are", I may vomit! Be more original as I am not the kind of girl who is easily flattered by compliments.

So for now I aim to blog about my experiences :) This experiment could turn out to be a total disaster and I'll go back to just chatting shit, but as a single lady this could be a bit of fun to spice up my rather dull life and who knows - I could just meet the 'one'! Yeah I got the giggles at this thought to!!!

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x

Just a quickie...

... to say I am sorry for not having blogged in the last month. Things have been mega hectic at work, at home and generally in life. We moved half the shop to a new location in order to expand, only to have to move it back a week later due to irrational business bitch issues with the new business partner. Then I went to Norway with my ladies and had lots of r and r (blog on Norway to follow) and now I am in full on summer cold mode, so can only be motivated to reach a tissue up to my nose to blow and place it back down again. I am feeling very sorry for myself as you can tell. But I can assure, those of you that care, (and I hope there is more than just my imaginary friend reading this) that by the end of this week I will have a new blog up!

So until then here is a cute picture of my cat hiding on top of the microwave to keep you going:

Peace out !
Random Quirky Girl x

Remain very still or you may scare it off...

So summer appears to have been and gone and with it so does the rationality of the British public. From women in scantily clad clothing, (some who really should have covered up more! Think of the people!) and men competing in an invisible Hawaiian shirt contest for the title of ‘tackiest shirt’, the British public appears to have gone gaga for the sunny spell we had last week. Not that I can blame them of course. I was unfortunate enough to be stuck in work for most of last week, so I could not take full advantage of the sun’s rays, not that I was bitter about that or anything.... But on my days off I was to be found in the garden, with a book, some sun cream (as I always try to sunbathe responsibly! That and the fact that I got my sperm donors pale genes, which means I burn mega easily) and an endless supply of peach squash, worshipping the sun with the rest of the UK. Not that you can tell! My legs are still a nice shade of white, my feet just look slightly dirty and I have a faint brown vest shape mark on my chest. All in all NOT a good two days attempting to absorb the sun’s rays. I would attempt to cheat with some fake tan, but the last time I used fake tan on my legs the results was very... bright. I was going to a Baywatch themed pub crawl (back in my uni days) and I decided that I couldn’t go out in my red hot pants and pub crawl tee with bright white legs, so I thought that I’d use fake tan to give them that sun kissed colour they so badly needed.  What I had failed to realise was that it was a gradual build tan. So by 9pm and after two glasses of wine with the girls, I was confused as to why my legs weren’t that brown.... so I put another coating on! To say I gave the Umpa Lumpa’s a run for their money in the orange stakes is a massive understatement!!!!! Throughout the night I just turned different shades of orange! You can actually mark the time frame of the night (based on the photos taken), due to the shade of my skin. When I went back into work on the following Monday, a colleague asked me if I had been on holiday over the weekend.  How anyone can think that orange is a natural skin colour is beyond me. In fairness though I had also turned up to this place of work with yellow and green tinges to my skin from face paint, due to themed nights out, so I suppose that anything was possible. So needless to say I have learnt my lesson the hard way on the fake tan front.

I was lucky growing up, to have the beach practically on my doorstep. Many a summer was spent down the beach either at lifeguards, (yes, this anti-exercise person was a lifeguard for a couple of years in my youth! What can I say? I was young and naive), or sunbathing and making up dance routines in the sea with my friends, (not one of my finest moments, thrashing around to ‘I’m a survivor’ by Destiny Child! Mega cringe).  Although, this did spoil me when we went on family holidays abroad! I was never interested in a trip to the beach, I would much rather frolic around the pool or go and visit day markets and see what nick knacks I could pick up. I went on a girly holiday to Gran Canaria three years ago, with two other girls from home and another from London. Whilst myself and the Porthcawl girls couldn’t see the fascination with a day on the beach, the Londoner was in her element when we relented and went to the beach for the day. To us it was just the same as back home, just with less rain. I suppose it is true what they say – you don’t miss what you have got. Regardless, I have many happy memories from my youth which revolve around the beach. Just last week me and the gang took advantage of the weather and went for a coffee down on the seafront and the smell of the salty air took us all back to our beach days. The smell that lingered on your skin and in your hair, long after you had left the beach and the noisy seagulls scrounging for the leftovers of people’s sandy picnic lunches. I think this is a smell that will forever remind me of my more innocent days. But, I also seemed to be able to tan a lot easier when I was younger too! I was talking to Miss Koko about my inability to tan my legs and she agreed that it did seem easier when we were younger to tan. Whether it was just because we were constantly out in the sun getting up to no good made it easier to tan, or the fact that with age our skin has just naturally got paler (something I personally blame on the change in climate to constantly grey skies), as we have both got older, it seems harder for us to catch a tan. I will still battle on to acquire a natural tan for my white legs! I will not be beaten by genetics, but may have to find a way around the lack of sun right now....

So I hope we haven’t had the last of our very British summer as I haven’t even been able to delve properly into my very crammed wardrobe and dig out all my summer clothes. These clothes deserve a chance to be worn surely and give my winter clothes a much needed rest. So keep your fingers and toes crossed, do as many sun dances as you can fit into your day and try and stock up on sun cream in an attempt to persuade the nice weather to have an encore. If it works for bands, boosting their egos until they come back on stage,  then surely the weather has to follow suit too?

Peace Out

Random Quirky Girl x

The Art of Reinvention

So whilst half asleep this morning and attempting to wrestle myself into some sort of clothing for work, I caught my reflection in the mirror and couldn't help thinking how much I've changed over the last year or so. I'm now rocking being a dumb blonde, I've pierced my nose, got my second set of holes pierced in my ears (but they closed up), and got inked twice (a blue Aum on my wrist and 6 ladybugs on my foot to represent my Mummy and Sibs), and I have also lost about a stone in weight (although there is still about half a stone to go until I'll be a little happier with my weight). And it got me thinking about how people constantly reinvent themselves.


Now I don't know about you, but it is pretty apparent by the above description that I enjoy reinventing myself and the way I look. I was speaking to Miss Red Star and Miss Koko about it the other day and I worked out that in the last year I've changed my hair colour at least 4 times. I've gone from Ribena Purple -> reddy brown -> blue black -> blonde. I suppose I am a little like Ramona Flowers from Scott Pilgrim vs the World film, as she was constantly changing her hair colour... although I do draw the line at bright green. However, the last hair colour change is still on going, (due to it being almost impossible to go straight from blue black to blonde), but I am enjoying my newly acquired drop in I.Q., which seem to comes as a side effect of the hair colour. That's my excuse anyway and I'm sticking to it! I have also got super cool brown- eyed prescription contact lenses, which have been known to make an appearance on nights out recently, much to the bemused looks of my friends. Gone is the geeky girl who actually wanted to pass her exams in school and enter the pierced, tattooed and grungy looking girl who has finally been let out of her cage, donned the geek chic glasses and adopting a more 'who gives a fuck' attitude to life. Well that's the plan anyway and that is only just the start.I am already itching to get a new piercing and another tattoo! They really are addictive little buggers. So in an attempt not to let modern technology get the better of me I have attempted to make a collage of photos illustrating the changes... so here goes...

Going from black to blonde; First Tattoo - Lady Bugs; Second Tattoo - Aum; and my nose piercing with my wicked brown contact lenses in.

Well after a lot of swearing and puzzled facial expressions about how to make a word document format as a picture it uploaded :) *does a little victory dance*. Modern Technology -0, RQG - 1.

Anyway I digress as per usual. I suppose for me reinventing the way I look has always been the best way I can express myself. Whilst I like to know what the latest fashion trends are, I try not to follow them to the t. I like to find a look and then make it a little different to fit with the way I am. For example, I went to Reading Festival in 2010 and the weather was a lot wetter and colder than any of us expected, so after a quick trip to one of the market stalls on the festival grounds, I came away with a wicked Minnie Mouse Vintage jumper. I love this jumper to bits as it is sooo versatile and 2 years later I am still wearing it and even as I type, I am cwtched up on the sofa wearing it. It can be dressed down with jeans or more grunged up with a dress and I have to admit it has become one of my wardrobe pieces that I dread ever breaking as it would be like losing a friend. Whilst I am on a roll with all this picture uploading malarkey, here is a picture of said jumper at said festival! I apologise in advance for the state of me, but at this time it was day 3, so I really was rocking the grungy look...

Me and Miss Red Star and my beautiful Minnie Mouse Jumper :)

See what did I tell you! Just amazing :) I remember in my early teens going through a massive hippy phase. I must have just come back from my first trip to Goa, (India) and thinking the hippy lifestyle was for me. I can't tell you how many pairs of stripey knee length socks and flared jeans I possessed during that phase, but there were a lot! There was a shop in Bridgend, known as the Hippy Shop, and on the rare occasions when me and my friends would venture into Bridgend, we would always end up in there for ages looking at all the stuff. One Christmas my room was practically redecorated with things from there. I have always dressed differently from my friends growing up though and always went with whatever I wanted to wear regardless of what fashion told us was a 'must' have. Myself and Miss Koko must have looked like a right odd pair of friends, as growing up our fashion tastes couldn't have been further apart! She was very prim and proper, (ignoring the pink outfit mishap of course), and I was there in loud colours and weird hair styles. But it worked! Even now we scare one another when we like the same outfit. But even then we wear it completely differently.

I suppose my love of fancy dress can be explained by my love of reinvention. When you are in your costume, you adopt a different persona and for that amount of time you are no longer you, but the character you are portraying! That, and I am still a big kid at heart. Uni was amazing for fancy dress as there were themed nights galore and often people would choose a fancy dress theme for their birthdays. I still have a box filled with fancy dress outfits and I await the occasion when I can rummage through the box and dress up again.

So whilst I am sure over the next year things will change even more, I look forward to the outcome. My hair will probably be a different colour by the end of the year and I may have new ink and piercings and I look forward to it all :) Life is too short to stay still for too long! Bring on the changes :)

Peace out!

RQG x

When I grow up, I want to be...

From a young age we are told we can achieve anything we set our minds to. Whether it is to become the next great football sensation for Chelsea, (I have to use this team or my brother would disown me, other teams are available) or a famous actress, constantly demanding the lime light and dating the most eligible bachelors, we are lead to believe that if we want it enough, then it will happen.

The first thing I ever wanted to be career-wise was a ballet dancer. I started from the age of either 2 and a half or 3 years old (it was a while ago, so my memory isn't what it used to be) and I thought this was the most magical career choice ever, as it all seemed so glamorous. All the older dancers at the first ballet school I attended, always seemed to look so elegant in their colourful leotards and floaty wraps, with their hair slicked into a bun, ready to hit the stage and mesmerise the audience without uttering one word. Just magical! My sister, Barbie (so called as she spends ages fake tanning and playing with her hair, which does always look amazing, but don't tell her I said that as I'll deny it), her first work aspiration was to be a dancing Crocodile! From a young age we were a family with realistic expectations, as you can tell!

Due to the fickleness of youth, my dreams of becoming the next Darcey Bussell was soon surpassed by my next dream of being a vet. However, when reality struck me that it wasn't as glamorous as Rolf Harris made out on Animal Hospital and that I would potentially have to put down cute kittens, it put me right off becoming a vet for life! Then I got bitten by the actress bug! I'm sure most girls and guys have gone through this stage at some point in their lives. I got the lead in our primary school show, and again in year 8 of secondary school and then I quit! I decided it was best to quit at the peak of my acting career, than risk being demoted to the crapper parts again. This was not met well by my drama/ choir teacher and I don't think to this day she has properly spoken to me since. I had a brief fling with the idea of becoming a fashion designer around this age, but my issue here was that I can't actually draw! Even my stick men suffer from extremely long necks and stubby arms, and my stick women have triangular fat bodies and no necks. So as you could imagine my sketched designs didn't actually resemble anything workable to be called fashion, unless you can work out how to make scribbles and blobs into fashion... maybe I missed my calling here? As a result, this dream was over before it even began. Finally, at the age of 13, I settled on becoming a kick ass Barrister. Well someone had to :p However, that year in school we sat a career test to determine what jobs we were best suited to and apparently I should have pursued a career as a hat maker or a window dresser! The results were varied between my fellow classmates and it appeared that the test still had the 1950's ideals that women had menial jobs, so that they could be the perfect wives, mothers and housewives, whilst the men remained the dominant breadwinners. This only made me more determined to compete for a career in a still rather male dominated role. So Barrister it was. I am naturally argumentative, or always right (as I like to think), so I thought what better career but to be paid to always be right.

So I got my GCSE's in order to go on to A Level in school, and then applied to 5 Unis to study Law and Criminology. On results day, I got up uber early to check the UCAS online page and found that I had gotten a place at Cardiff University to study Law and Criminology LLB. I didn't actually care about my grades as I had gotten into my first choice university. But four years later, (I may have partied a little too hard first year and had to resit my first year, well contract and tort law modules again. Or as I look at it I just loved the law soooo much first year,that I studied it for an extra year. Yeah no one else fell for that bullshit excuse either.

And then what... I finished uni and find out I actually hated law. Like passionately. Plus with this media sensationalised recession that has still got its hands firmly round the throat of Britain, the call for Barristers has decreased dramatically and so I decided that weighing up the financial costs, it wasn't actually a financially sound option. So I took a year out to help my Mum open a traditional sweet shop in Chepstow Town - Sherbet and Lemon - Check it out as it is awesome! I am now coming to the end of my year of discovery and all I have discovered is I am no closer now, than I was at 12, to deciding what I want to do when I grow up. I've been knocking around with the idea of getting into journalism, with a focus on music and the arts and which probably encouraged me to start this whole blogging malarkey, (so... sorry about that), or something to do within the music industry (but not performing as people would want their money back if they had to endure me singing). But for now, I'm just coasting through life taking each day as it comes. Hopefully by the end of the one year career sabbatical, I will have some idea what direction my life is going in... So let's just watch this space I suppose, unless anyone wants to offer me a super cool job? Yeah, I thought not...

Peace Out
Random Quirky Girl x